MAKING THE BOYBAND
My name is The Manager.
I'm going to create a boyband.
The boyband will reach fame on a grand scale.
They will dominate the popular charts and their faces will adorn the walls of millions of teenage girls across the globe.
When manufacturing a boyband, the first thing we need is the right selection of boys.
In order to guarantee maximum success, each boy has to appeal to a specific set of fundamental rules. The rules are as follows:
Rule 1 - The boys in the boyband must , honour and obey their manager and must have no other manager but me.
Rule 2 - They must sacrifice their privacy.
Rule 3 - The boys must NOT have girlfriends.
Rule 4 - Some of the boys in the band will have to take 1 or 2 years off their real ages.
Rule 5 - The boys must always be ambiguous about their sexuality, never confirming their sexual orientation (...) the centre of the market
Rule 6 - They must always be prepared to smile.
Rule 7 - The boyband must always be gracious, humble, like the boys next door.
Rule 8 - The boys must be prepared to wear make up.
Rule 9 - They must never become close to one other, they must never become real friends, just incase one of them breaks down and has to be discarded.
Rule 10 - The most important of all, the boys in the band but be very, very, PRETTY!
OK, we have our boys, we have our audience, now what we need is a groove, is this a groove?!
OK, we have our groove....
can our boyband dance?
Can our boyband... BREAKDANCE?!
The boys in the band must be able to perform a dance routine, that includes ALL members of the band, including those that are reluctant to dance
Now that's good, you really are beginning to look like a boyband.
But can you sound like a boyband?
Can a boyband SING?
Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome for your entertainment... TAKE THAT!
